Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Blessings

Tonight I am snug in my bed, working from my laptop, as my son watches tv with me. My daughter is munching on toast and my dog is desperately trying to catch the crumbs. My husband is adjusting our new tv set in the front room, rejoicing in the fact that I finally got around to purchasing the gift that we've sworn we would buy for the last two years.

I am prone to be a "glass half empty" type of person. I have always struggled with anxiety and depression, and I believe this automatically programs me to look at things from a pessimistic viewpoint. It's what comes naturally to me. Besides, if you already expect the worst, you can't be disappointed, right?

Wrong. One of the biggest life lessons I've learned is that curve balls can be thrown in every direction, in ways that you never imagined. There's no sense in trying to predict the future when you can't. It's impossible.

Today I finished my official work in my interim position, and felt tremendous relief to have that potentially finalized. I say potentially because there is the possibility that there will still not be another person hired to fill that spot when we begin back in January. But for now, things are good. My work looks good, and I'm proud of what I've accomplished.

My son and daughter are both here, ready for Christmas with their dad and me. We've made Christmas cookies and seen lights and gone shopping and wrapped presents and decorated the tree. We've enjoyed each other's company. Gabi is happy and finally flealess, which is a cause for celebration in and of itself.

My family is anxiously awaiting our visit in a few days, and I am so thankful for the opportunity to see them. It will be a time to spend together, building memories and bonding again. My friends are close and healthy. My husband's foot is healing and his mood is good.

Today I went out and did something completely out of character--I purchased a brand new LCD HDTV. A smaller, economical model, but still, a new TV. I worried about the purchase the whole way home and then, after my husband hooked it up, we all rejoiced in a beautiful picture. And I wished my family Merry Christmas, and my husband Happy Birthday, and both of us Happy Anniversary...all of the occasions we have been planning this purchase and never followed through.

My cup is half full, like most people's. But I'm blessed. And I am determined, as I continue on this journey called my life, to recognize the half-full blessing of the glass God has given me more often. I am blessed, and so thankful.

God bless us, every one.

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